Song of the Month Club February 2017

What is the Song of the Month Club?

It's a place where musicians come to give and receive feedback on their work. Anyone is welcome, whatever their level of ability.

The spirit of the club is to contribute: if you submit a song for others to comment on, you should also have the courtesy to listen to everyone else's contributions and give as much feedback as possible. Posting a track and not listening and commenting on others is not cool.

The purpose of feedback is to be honest. Essentially you should give your truthful impressions of the song, whether good or bad. Negative feedback, if done in the right spirit and with courtesy, can be the most useful and can help the artist to grow and improve and correct their mistakes.

All submissions are welcome, don't hesitate if you want to contribute. Instrumentals are fine, but songs with vocals are even better. A bad vocal is better than no vocal, so if you are thinking of experimenting with vocals this is a good place to get started.

We ask that you only post one song per month in this thread - if you're lucky enough to be able to produce more, then please just submit your strongest material

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Comments

  • A bit of Soulful House. Enjoy. Vocal Acapella is from LoopMasters.

  • Shit. It's February. It's as if time has reached free fall.

  • edited February 1

    Back finally with a new thing, and am very interested to see what is thought of it, as this one really amuses me. It has a somewhat lengthy back story, but I'll not bog with details here. If anyone's interested I'll elaborate later.

    Anyway, Richard always says he likes singing, so here you go! [Edit: Click through to Soundcloud to see the lyrics]

  • @aaronpc said:
    Back finally with a new thing, and am very interested to see what is thought of it, as this one really amuses me. It has a somewhat lengthy back story, but I'll not bog with details here. If anyone's interested I'll elaborate later.

    Anyway, Richard always says he likes singing, so here you go! [Edit: Click through to Soundcloud to see the lyrics]

    It's a pretty cool piece of avant-guardism, I know another friend who likes to use synthetic vocals, they can sound pretty weird.

    The thing that really works is that the vocal melody is really good, so good that I would like to hear a human sing this song, because the thing that works less well is that the words are unintelligible when sung in that robot voice and it's quite distracting.

    The musical backing is great, just slightly weird and fits both the song and your style well, some nice sounds going on there. And if you strip out all the experimentalism, behind it all there is a good song - so it's the right mix of the weird and the classic. The song would easily stand the test of being sung with an acoustic guitar, and might even be the better for it (but of course that's not the point).

    In think overall it's a great tune, but the robot vocal isn't quite pulled off IMO. Maybe you should bite the bullet and record the vocal yourself :smile:

  • @aaronpc Glorious mess which put me in mind of three small Welsh choirs in adjacent chapels expiating themselves but cheerfully.

    I found it a challenge to stay with it, not the listening, the listening I enjoyed very much, but the lack of tether that my little head so always looks for. Even to the point that I was longing for a very tight classical perfect end, but most of that speaks to my own conservative ears.

    I think it stands well as the thing it is, but for rest of us more dull mortals I do want to hear the same song (but of course then it wouldn't be the same song) as sung by Bonnie Prince Billy one hungover morning. Please.

  • edited February 2

    I'm back writing short clips for a music licensing site...these are so much fun to do....they may be short but speak volumes :) https://soundcloud.com/buddemeyer72/derek-buddemeyer-horizon-at

  • edited February 2

    @aaronpc that was amazing brother, wow.. i love the music in the background, and for this song the robot vocals really work nice, this is right up my alley and probably one of my fav songs ive heard made on iOS.

    @DerekBuddemeyer I dig that! That could easily be a film soundtrack moment, very peaceful and flowing

    @trackedout im not a big rock guy but I enjoyed this song, the little orchestral flair at the end is a nice touch

  • @DerekBuddemeyer said:
    I'm back writing short clips for a music licensing site...these are so much fun to do....they may be short but speak volumes :) https://soundcloud.com/buddemeyer72/derek-buddemeyer-horizon-at

    Very ominous in a high school horror film kind of a way :) With all the talk (by those more aurally edcuated than me) as regards pianos and their respective qualities, what did you use here?

  • @JohnnyGoodyear said:

    @DerekBuddemeyer said:
    I'm back writing short clips for a music licensing site...these are so much fun to do....they may be short but speak volumes :) https://soundcloud.com/buddemeyer72/derek-buddemeyer-horizon-at

    Very ominous in a high school horror film kind of a way :) With all the talk (by those more aurally edcuated than me) as regards pianos and their respective qualities, what did you use here?

    This was all Beatmaker2 with some custom crafted instruments I've been working on for the last few years. Then I pack everything up and port everything over to AudioShare for some quick fade outs and dump everything in my Dropbox :)

  • @DerekBuddemeyer said:

    @JohnnyGoodyear said:

    @DerekBuddemeyer said:
    I'm back writing short clips for a music licensing site...these are so much fun to do....they may be short but speak volumes :) https://soundcloud.com/buddemeyer72/derek-buddemeyer-horizon-at

    Very ominous in a high school horror film kind of a way :) With all the talk (by those more aurally edcuated than me) as regards pianos and their respective qualities, what did you use here?

    This was all Beatmaker2 with some custom crafted instruments I've been working on for the last few years. Then I pack everything up and port everything over to AudioShare for some quick fade outs and dump everything in my Dropbox :)

    custom crafted instruments all very mysterious there Mister Buddemeyer :)

  • @aaronpc said:
    It has a somewhat lengthy back story, but I'll not bog with details here. If anyone's interested I'll elaborate later.

    Welcome back. Yes please. I would. How is a spoiler set up from an iPad? Anyone please? Is that what they are? Touch the button and all appears. Up to the listener then if they choose to delve deeper into why you wrote the song. Always interesting.

  • Ah, thank you kind sir. Much appreciated. New buttons to play with. :)

  • @Bluepunk said:
    Ah, thank you kind sir. Much appreciated. New buttons to play with. :)

    I'm all about the buttons :) Actually, as a writer of words who then mumbles I LOVE the spoiler function...

  • @richardyot @JohnnyGoodyear Enjoy the comments, guys. Thanks. When I have to reread to be sure I get the gist, then I know I'm on to something. I like the in-between. The truth is I went through two days of failed singing sessions before seeking out this solution. I'm an okay singer, but this one's just not in my register. I sound ridiculous. That said, I may make a final pass at it and try combining it with the vox through Sparkle/Mobius Lab or some other combinatamator and see if I can improve the comprehension while maintaining the weird. Btw- there is an instrumental version on SC, too, if you want to hear it sans linguistic vertigo.

    @Gaia.Tree Thanks so much! I'm usually guilty of my songs being more desktop DAW than iOS based, but this has pretty strong iOS ties, so I'll take the compliment.

    @Bluepunk As you wish. It's kind of lengthy, so I'll go ahead and try out the spoiler gizmo. I had actually tried to do this very thing for the lyrics earlier (I knew most people wouldn't be able to make out the vox), but I missed the button and was trying to use straight markdown and gave up.

    Here's the story:

    This was my first attempt at making a song which could be performed live via only the iPad, phone and midi controller. The occasion was the marriage of an old friend, who put the call out for speeches, singing etc. during the reception, and the location was Champoeg State Park, Oregon. Everybody is camping out, wedding goes well, reception goes fine, too. Great.

    I didn't have lyrics though, and since I want to finish the song out in a more final way and send it to them as a kind of wedding gift, that part had to get knocked out. Since I can't write normal lyrics, I focused on the setting. This Champoeg area is an interesting spot. Its main feature is a giant meadow. Scattered around this meadow are posts with typical street names on them (Main, Elm, etc.). It turns out that the park is here because it's the spot of the first incorporated town in the Northwest Territory, full of homes, businesses and a church, and was all set to be the capitol of Oregon someday. The problem is that the Willamette river sat 40 feet below it, down a nearby cliff, and one day the river decided to rise 50+ feet and wash all their nice work down to the Pacific. Oregon!

    That's not the most interesting part. Not to me, anyway. The only reason this perfect place to put a town— a giant open meadow right near the river, even existed was because for a thousand years the native Kalapuya tribe had been systematically burning the brush, forcing deer to come out in the open on their way to the river so they could shoot arrows at them and have a big banquet once a year. The fires, and the occasional flood, also served to make the soil very fertile, and they would collect a root vegetable here that grew better than anywhere else. And fish in the river. That is, until the white man showed up with his diseases, reducing the local population from 15K down to about 60. Anyway…

    So now this unique place, heaving with history, is a great place for frisbee golf and weddings. Nothing wrong with that. People have been hooking up and having dinners there for over a thousand years, and it just keeps on going, which is pretty cool. Now— the lyrics about the river/flood/boy being there or not being there is time/space stuff— the river may look like it's been there since the beginning, but that was different water, different fish, even different rocks. Not the same river. The town and the boy don't exist as far as you're concerned. So the cliched wedding message for my friends is to stay in the moment. I just put it in a distracting package.

    And if the story ends up piquing anyone's interest now, here are the lyrics:

    There's nothing here now
    But there is a river
    A small canoe, the ghost of a boy
    And a net
    The fish have all died
    Or been caught then eaten
    And the boy is gone
    Because you haven't been born
    Not yet

    The river's not really there
    It's deceiving
    It never seems to change
    But it's actually a blur
    Because the river, she never stays
    She's always leaving
    And as she goes
    You're just another ghost to her

    There's a marker by the shore now
    But not really
    For a town that washed away
    If you were there
    There are ghosts of streets,
    The horses, and the buildings
    And the flood that came and took them away
    Somewhere

    The river, it has a start
    And then an ending
    But it is never really here, it's more of a "when"
    The only way to ever really see the river
    Is to close your eyes
    and then you have to jump in
    You have to jump in.

  • @aaronpc Good story, nicely told.

  • Yup, and I love those lyrics.

  • @richardyot said:
    Yup, and I love those lyrics.

    Thanks for that, because they took for-effing-ever to write.

  • Struggle writing love songs. And singing in tune. Tried harder to do so on this, in parts, after last months chats. Where do you write your lyrics? Laid on a log, down at the beach for me. The Punk Bunk. Have a NEW log now. Surfer tourists burnt my original baby. This was the last idea of a song that i shared with log number 1. I have a name for the murderer and have changed the ending to let him know, i know. Can't wait to meet him this spring. Him and his gang plunder our beaches twice a year.

    Was staring out to sea, trying to feel what that "miles of blue" would tell me if it could talk. Would be wonderful to think that even the ocean had fallen in love. But what with? Another body of water? Would he cheat? Of course he would! End of love song. In the verses, i'm, just there, talking to a very naughty lake. In the chorus, i'm chatting to a cheeky ocean, who is her father. The mother (floozy) is a man made receptacle. Haven't worked out who "i am" is, possibly a weird, wild wind? The wife agrees.

    Got thrown into a lake once. Bastard thing. Dark down there. The boys responsible fell into a deep well two days later. Are you listening Mister Surfer? You killed my song writing buddy, didn't you Pool. No, Paoauol. No, P...

  • edited February 5

    @Bluepunk Brilliant. You're certifiable of course, in the long and eccentric British tradition. And while I hear some Robert Wyatt and Uncle Ian Dury in your work (and yes some JCC as previously discussed), I must be honest and say I also hear some post-prog in with the post-punk as well.

    Very clever vocal interplay in particular of course. And your signature bile, at risk perhaps with this love subject, is at it peripatetic best; wherever your mind wanders, there it is :)

    There is an honored place in music, politics, in history in general, for The Fool or Jester. And in the Tarot deck of this Club I so nominate you...

  • @trackedout I like the scummy vibe and unexpected stuff, like the lumpy bass. Keeps me interested. I only wish the the vocals and music had less of a disconnect from each other (like you're listening to two sound files, rather than one song). They need to share the same air. A little shared distortion, maybe.

  • @JohnnyGoodyear Thank you sir. I will gladly take those cards. The "Fool" one, was 90 seconds from appearing out of the deck, with a ripped up Manc double as company, at the bookies earlier. Jesus! Yes, exactly. Saviour.

    I will be writing a sequel in mid June, when "they" return. Right. Let's try this out because I forgot before. Sorry.

    This is how I see it going down. They were brave actions from my friends with boards. Rubbing my hands together looking forward to spring. Shin high, cherry red Doc Martins look rather fetching combined with vintage, well worn Speedo's, emblazoned with white lilies don't you think? I will wear nowt else for this somber occasion.

    They'll be pointing at the lone figure as I approach across the sand, this, after I've eaten their VW Transporter as a tasty starter. Huddled around a fire, (don't) they will be giggling to each other, muttering words to the effect of;

    "Look out lads, what have we here. Some kind of nutter escaped his carers while out on day release? Should've applied factor 50, cos his body is all burnt. And his head! That's almost exploding with redness. What is he doing, stomping up the beach like Basil Fawlty on smack? Ha... ha. Must be planning on speedily downing some shitty trees so we can burn them tonight. Otherwise, why is he firing that chainsaw up quicker than Jason fuckin Vorhees! Oh. Shit! Quick. Drop the weak, insipid drugs, and Wilko's hair gel behind, just RUN for your lives!"

    Near enough lads. Close enough. Nah, I'll just give em a big cwtch. >!

  • See. Fucked it up. Sorry again. Going to bed. Tech. No one believes me.

  • A little ditty on the subject of regret for your listening (hopefully pleasure).

  • @Bluepunk said:
    See. Fucked it up. Sorry again. Going to bed. Tech. No one believes me.

    Every new line break needs a

    >!

    Not fun when you have a bunch of lyrics.

  • @aaronpc said:

    @Bluepunk said:
    See. Fucked it up. Sorry again. Going to bed. Tech. No one believes me.

    Every new line break needs a

    >!

    Not fun when you have a bunch of lyrics.

    I bet! Thank god I won't be attempting that for another month. And thank you for your assistance, and back story, which I will read and digest whilst listening to your tune. :) Cheers.

  • Dear esteemed fellow iOS music app lovers and talented musicians,

    I am not a musician, but I love playing with music apps. This is my first project that I tried to make into a full song. Please consider that when you listen to it. Your criticism will be much appreciated.

    Regards,
    Hennie

    https://soundcloud.com/hennie-coetzee/synth-in-f-minor

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