Do you ever feel defeated by music?
So I've been struggling with these tunes for like 4 or 5 years now. I started these beats when my 2nd kid was born, and of course I just don't have an damn time to finish anything. So over last weekend I actually finished a track. Got the whole thing done, got a mix I dig and some home-made quick mastering that was admittedly not perfect.
I farmed the mix out to some friends, and got mostly positive feedback, and the constructive comments jived with my own criticisms of the mastering. Ok - no harm no foul.
Yesterday I had a completely shit day. Just upside down from stem to stern. Construction company is fixing my kitchen, so my kitchen is currently in the living room. My bedroom is so tiny and cluttered at the moment you can't even move in there. Work is frustrating as hell lately. I had band rehearsal last night and I was so stressed I almost completely forgot about it. Couldn't get my head in the game the whole night, but still had a good time.
At the end of rehearsal, I played the new tune for the drummer and he kinda tore it apart sonically. I love this guy - he's my boy. And I understand that he's coming from a place of being constructive and wanting to help. But man alive, I wasn't in the space to hear that after the day I had, and admittedly I probably opened myself up to criticism just through my eagerness to play him the tune.
Anyway, ever since I've just felt kinda defeated. I've listened to the tune too much and can't even hear it now. My production sounds like poop to me, and I'm generally feeling very defeated about the whole thing, when just a few days ago I was elated that I actually finished a thing.
I just wanted to say all this because I wanted to tell you all: coming here daily just brings me so much joy. It really does - it distracts me from the stresses of life and of work, it allows me to share the things I've learned over the years, it shows me tricks I wouldn't have thought of on my own, it's introduced me to new friends, and I've made connections and learned things I never would have otherwise.
So thank you. All of you. I know I blab a lot around this joint, but it helps on those days when things are just not as awesome as I'd like them to be. I really look forward to everyone's posts each morning when I get up.